Monday, March 7, 2016

Eden Winters - Ode to Goodreads

Ask twenty authors their opinion of Goodreads and you'll get twenty different answers. I, however, find it inspiring. So inspiring that I wrote this little poem:

Ode to Goodreads
by Eden Winters

I went to Goodreads,
Hey, don’t you scoff.
Fourteen new ratings,
New book is taking off,
But then I look too closely
That’s when I feel the pain,
“This book could be much better,
She ain’t no Amy Lane.”

I ain’t no Amy Lane,
No I can’t make ‘em cry,
I ain’t no Amy Lane,
And now I wonder why.

Amy she’s got it going,
She writes ten books a day,
And all get five star ratings,
I don’t know what to say,
‘Cause when I visit Goodreads,
I feel the pain again,
“This book should be more angsty,
She’s ain’t no Amy Lane.”

I ain’t no Amy Lane,
No I can’t knit, I fear,
I ain’t no Amy Lane,
I pub one book a year.

Now Amy’s back list stretches,
From Maine to Anaheim,
How does she keep the names straight?
I can’t keep up with mine.
And when I go to Goodreads
I get so confused,
No matter what I do,
I get the same reviews!

I ain’t no Amy Lane,
Can’t write a book an hour,
I ain’t no Amy Lane,
I’m so in awe of her.

I switched up genres,
Wrote me some ‘rotica,
Yeah, that oughta,
Get some attention,
Get some reviews,
But when I look on Goodreads
That’s when I see this news:

“She ain’t no Lacy Tate,
Can’t make those truckers hot,
She ain’t no Lacy Tate,
Oh no, she’s not.”

So when you see me smiling,
On covers far and near,
Be gentle,
and I won’t shed a tear,
To keep things simple,
I’ve changed my name,
From Eden Winters to
“No Amy Lane.”


I went to BookLikes,
Let them have their say,
and read these words:
“She ain’t no Andrew Grey.”

Author's note: I have the utmost respect for all authors mentioned in this poem, and obtained permission for use. 


  1. LOL! Okay, maybe they're more popular than you, but can they write kick-ass poems and make me laugh? I don't think so. :D


    1. And I wrote this one sober. Back in the day, let me tell ya...