My dear friend and partner in writing, P.D. Singer, posted an excellent essay on the topic that's well worth reading.
Find it here:
And to lay waste to the argument that safer sex is a "woman thing", Lambda award winning author Brent Hartinger masterminds The Real Story Safe Sex Project, promoting safe sex, in part, through books.
Find more about the project and download his free story, Two Thousand Pounds Per Square Inch, here:
I'm currently at work on a short story for the project.